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Sorry to hear you're having trouble.
I'm afraid that only the family admin account can adjust your settings within the family. They can do this either via https://xbox.com/family or via the Xbox Family App. If your mother has forgotten their login details then they would need to follow the instructions under the 'I've forgotten my sign in details' bar at this link https://support.microsoft.com/home/contact?linkquery=Help%20me%20sign%20in%20to%20my%20Microsoft%20account.
Please note for future reference that Microsoft is only able to help the account owner with account issues.