my friend made a purchase on my card on an in app purchase and i’d like it returned

Hello

Even though you are the card holder, but if this is a purchase directly with Microsoft, it is your friend's account Microsoft would deal with, menaing your friend needs to contact Microsoft to get it canceled.

What your friend would need to do:

To get help, open the "Get Help" app on your computer (just search for it in the Start menu). or go to https://support.microsoft.com/contactus, Type "Billing" and press Enter. On the next screen, click "Contact support" at the bottom of the page, then choose "Microsoft 365" > "Manage my subscription". You’ll then see the option to chat with a Microsoft support agent who has access to your account to help review the issue.

Otherwise contact your credit card company, dispute it as an unauthorized spending.