Can not change privacy & security settings for xbox.

Have the second adult account create and organize the family, then invite the locked Minecraft/Xbox account as a member—adding the second account to the locked account’s family does not give it authority over the locked profile.

Correct the family roles and permissions

1. Sign in to Microsoft Family using the other adult Microsoft account.
2. Select Add a family member.
3. Invite the affected Xbox/Minecraft account and assign it the Member role.
4. Accept the invitation while signed in to the affected account.

Only organizers can add members and administer family permissions; Microsoft recommends Organizer for an adult managing the group and Member for the managed account.^1^ This reverses the arrangement already attempted.

5. Sign in to Xbox.com with the organizer account.
6. Select the organizer’s gamertag → More actions (…) → Xbox settings → Privacy & online safety.
7. Select the affected account’s gamertag.
8. Under Privacy and Xbox Series X|S, Xbox One, and Windows devices Online Safety, change these settings as applicable:
   • Communication with voice and text: Everyone
   • Communication outside Xbox with voice and text: Allow
   • Community creations: Everyone
   • Multiplayer/cross-network play: Allow
9. Select Submit at the bottom before changing tabs. These are the documented organizer-managed Xbox privacy controls.^2^

A matching locked-profile case was resolved through this organizer/member arrangement; changes can take up to 24 hours to apply.^3^

Afterward:

1. Sign out of the Microsoft Store, Xbox app, and Minecraft Launcher.
2. Wait for the permission change to propagate, then sign back into all three with the affected account.
3. Reopen Minecraft and test chat. Minecraft Java chat access depends on the corresponding account safety settings.^4^

You may leave the family after confirming that chat works, although testing first avoids losing the organizer’s ability to make another correction.

If the organizer still cannot change the settings

Your screenshots show an adult birth date and no existing organizer, so do not keep changing the date of birth or repeatedly leave/rejoin families. If the affected profile remains greyed out even when selected by the separate organizer, the Xbox-side account classification may require support intervention.

Contact Microsoft Support, enter Xbox privacy settings locked for adult account, select Get Help, and then Contact Support.^5^ Provide:

• The screenshot showing “You do not have permissions to edit these options”
• The screenshot showing the adult date of birth
• Confirmation that the account is normally outside a family
• Confirmation that a separate organizer added it as a member but still could not edit its Xbox permissions

A closely matching adult-account case required escalation through Xbox Support after the profile continued to be treated as a child profile.^6^

References

1. Add people to your family group | Microsoft Support
2. Manage XBOX online safety and privacy settings
3. How to fix microsoft account privacy and safety settings. - Microsoft Q&A
4. Troubleshoot Minecraft: Java Edition Chat Access
5. Managing parental consent | Microsoft Support
6. My Xbox account wont let me change Privacy Settings just goes back to original values even after verifying my age - Microsoft Q&A